It’s that time of year: we’re claiming goals, setting intentions, making big plans for 2019. I'm going to share some powerful secrets to help you actually STICK WITH your goals this year. No more “Failure February”, babe.
Are you sick and tired of fizzing out by mid January?
It's frustrating, am I right? We beat up on ourselves for missing the mark, but maybe it’s not our fault.
From business to wellness, relationships and financial …. there are so many goals we set for ourselves because we deserve MORE. But year after year, we find ourselves struggling and falling short. So let's get real on what you need to do to actually live your best life. Warning: This is not going to be your cookie cutter BS, it's time we got real on what WORKS.
Frustrated: Been there, done that. Finally, last year, I had the ah-a moment that evolved throughout the year into a movement. I FINALLY found myself achieving the goals I had in my business, my wellness and even in my relationships.
These are 5 truths I KNOW (if you put into ACTION) are going to blow your damn mind.
Knowing your WHY
Simon Sinek says - “Our actions should start with WHY not WHAT”. Knowing your WHY is essential. Your “WHY” is more powerful than your “what”. Many times we fail setting goals because we actually set a ‘what’. So if I asked you - What are your resolutions for 2019?
Maybe your answer is “to lose 10 pounds”. That’s a WHAT and that has very little power. Your WHY is where your strength waits. Using health as an example - if your goal/resolution is to lose weight, let's rework that to make it more powerful.
What does that transformation do for you? What is the emotion behind it? To reclaim your power or to get the spark back into your life? Maybe you want to get healthy to inspire/show loved ones it’s possible for them too. That WHY is your resolution. Take it from the ‘what’ - into the ‘why’.
Here are 4 steps we are going to use - the 4 Ws for successful Goal Setting -
1. What are you going to do to achieve your goals? - Whatever that WHY is or that change is, ask yourself - What will you do to achieve it?
2. When will you do it? - When will you do those action steps to achieve your goal?
3. Where will this take place? Where will you show up?
4. With who? - Are you going to do it by yourself or are you going to do it with your partner or bff?
Here's an example of taking it out from what-ville into the powerful WHY using the 4 Ws.
Goal - If you what is to lose 50 pounds, to get in shape this year or if you want to get into size X jeans.
Reword it using the 4 Ws - Improved Goal - “I'm going to jog around the neighborhood at least 3 mornings a week with my neighbor.”
Which one feels more actionable or powerful? Which one holds more accountability for you every single day?
Because, on a Tuesday, when you are tired and unmotivated your why of “I want to lose 50 pounds this year”, has no urgency ... you have a whole YEAR to lose 50 pounds and not showing up today doesn’t seem like a big deal. But when you strengthen your goal with your 4 Ws - “ I'm going to jog around the neighborhood, 3 mornings a week with my neighbor” .. and it's Tuesday + it's one of the 3 mornings + you've got a commitment with your neighbor, do you think your odds of showing up will MUCH higher?
This is something that you may be struggling with; I know I did. Goals with steps that actually let you HAVE control vs. outcomes that you possibly can't control. Think about it, how many times do you set a goal that you have no control over? I want you to set your resolutions with steps that let you have control. Stop setting you up for failure.
Going back to the weightloss example ...if your resolution is to lose 50 pounds this year - you may not have total control over it.
You can do everything right, you can show up for yourself, eat the right things and do all the workouts, but you still don't have total control. Our bodies have a mind of their own, so many things impact us - stress, sleep, hormones, your body genetics: you don't have all the control.
But you know what you DO have control over? Rewording that goal to “I'm going to walk 5 times a week and switch to healthier snacks and veggies.”.Every single day you can be a success, it's something you have control over, something that makes you successful very single day which in turn makes you more powerful.
It works the same in your business. So let's say you've set a goal - “I'm going to rank up this month” or “I'm going to hit a certain $$ or earn an incentive or a free trip this month”. Ultimately, even though you have 90% control over that, because you are a part of an organization, a team or a partnership, you don't have 100% control in most cases because there are a lot of moving pieces. So a more actionable goal that you actually have control over will be “I'm going to help 5 people in MY team achieve their goals.” As you know success trickles up .. we can control helping others and helping others gets us where we want.
Try the trifacta
Research has shown that you are 43% more likely to be successful by doing these 3 steps consistently.
writing down your goals
committing to a plan of action
regularly sharing your progress with someone.
Doing these 3 things together is going to increase your chances of success. As you put these into motion you’ll begin to see “extra benefits” you weren’t even planning on. It’s called the Halo effect.
Halo effect Example- if your goal was to level up in your biz and you created your action plan with your 4 w’s.. instead of focusing on “ranking up” you’d changed it to - “My goal this year is to help 5 people achieve their goals this month”. Beautiful things are going to happen around you. You’re going to increase and grow relationships with those people and your team, you are going to find support that you didn't know you had, personal momentum and success are going to start pouring into you. What you put out, you get back. Your own success, income etc. will start growing, which will make you more confident... and so in and so on.
Think WWASD - What would a Sloth Do?
If you can put yourself into that mindset when you are setting action steps for your goals you are going to be so much more successful. Find the path of least resistance which will make doing the RIGHT thing the EASY thing. Doesn't that make so much sense with your own goals?
So when setting your wellness or fitness goal which action steps make more sense for your success -
Joining the expensive fancy gym that's 20 miles away and has all the bells and the whistles?
OR joining the plain Jane gym right down the road from your home … the one you pass every time you go anywhere?
Which one is going to be the most clear path to success for you? Which one do you think you are going to show up for more?
Even though the first one is fancy, instagram worthy and has all the facilities, what's it going to do for your health when you start getting tired of the drive, when you start putting up some resistance and have every excuse not to battle traffic to get there? The plane jane gym right there in your neighborhood is going to be the path of least resistance every single time.
Same thing with your business; so think 'What would a Sloth Do' and pick the path of least resistance & do it.
So if you want to level up in your biz & you hateeee doing live videos, will setting a goal of Doing Live videos every single day do any good for you? Would that be the path of least resistance or will that be an excuse for not showing up everyday? Maybe setting the goal to do one live a week will get you better results.
Always think what would a sloth do because getting to sure success is better than a 50-50 chance of shots fired & missed.
Fail Forward Queen aka Getting comfortable with failure
"God! I've failed so many times!". I used to use it as negative and beat up myself until finally something shifted and I realized (insert positive tone) "I have failed so many times!"
If I wasn't moving forward or making changes I wouldn't have failed at all. You have to get really comfortable with failure this year. Yes, I'm telling you 2019 needs to be your year of failure! Coming from the #FailForwardQueen, let me tell you, when you’re racking up failures and you are celebrating them: that means you are making changes. If you aren’t experiencing ANY failures I'm going to call you out and tell you that's not something to celebrate. If your failure mark is truly zero that means you are not changing, moving, growing, pushing and definitely NOT hitting goals. Because there's no one alive on the face of this earth who's win-loss column is completely in the success. It's just not possible so get so comfortable with failure that you celebrate them.
These 5 tips are going to actually give you a REAL fighting chance at making these resolutions stick this time and getting into success. A lot of people are sharing tips and doing things by the book - setting goals, intentions & writing them down etc. - but if you don't know the strength/gameplan behind doing them then you are going to have another year of status quo.